Homemade In-n-Out Animal Fries

We haven’t been to Southern California in a little over 3 months now. That means that the In-n-Out withdrawal, the so-called “out-n-out,” has finally set in. Luckily for us, with AK‘s creativity and SP‘s methodicalness, we have a temporary solution until our next visit West. Or South. Wherever there’s burgers.

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We’ve tried a few different ways of making what we miss most: animal style fries. People like the burgers and all, but for us, it’s all about that extremely saucy, super oniony fry mixture that gets our motors running. There are some serious bummer recipes out there that basically say that Thousand Island dressing is the same thing. They’re wrong. Here’s the closest we’ve come:

THE RECIPE FOR THE SOUSE:

  • 1 cup Hellmann’s Light Mayo
  • 1/2 cup (or a little extra) Ketchup
  • 3 Tbsp sweet pickle relish
  • 1/2 tsp salt
  • 1/2 tsp pepper
  • 1 tsp sugar
  • 1 tsp cider vinegar

Basically you mix all of it and set it in the fridge for a couple hours for maximum impact. But making it looks a little funny.

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Heinz for the appropriate taste.

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Maaaayo. Maaaaaaaaaaaayo. Daylight come and me wanna make fries.

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SOMEONE BLED ALL OVER OUR MAYO!

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We relish making this sauce.

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You can also add a bit of garlic powder if you want.

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If you went to Kindergarten, you may remember that you get different colors when you mix stuff together.

Ok, so the sauce is made. The next important part is the umyum. This part is even more tricky than mixing the sauce because it requires patience, varying temperatures, and a keen eye. We’ll leave the eyeball part to AK.

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White onion outperforms yellow onion in this mixture.

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Dice. (Yes there’s yellow onion back there that we were going to use for our Sloppy Joes.)

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A tbsp and a half of vegetable oil, and throw in the onions.

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Leave it on super low heat, covered, for 30 minutes. For serious. Just leave it alone. SP STOP OPENING IT TO CHECK ON THEM!

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After that 30 minutes, bring the heat up and stir for about 6-8 minutes. Then throw in 1/4-1/2 cup of water, leaving it on hot, and let the water cook out. This will help loosen any stubborn bits of umyum and help the flavor get a bit smoky.

Ok. Now it’s time to build our animal fries. We may be a bit sacrilegious because we aren’t using cheese, but then again, we can’t source In-n-Out fries either. So this can only be a temporary fix.

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We used some Ore Ida “zesties.” They’re great seasoned fries to make in the oven and really good quality fries no matter the style you get. 

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Get some of the umyums on there.

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DOUSE IN SOUSE!!

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Served tonight alongside some homemade Untidy Josephs.

Please feel free to try the recipe and give us your feedback!

Man it feels good to type up some stuff again. Catch you on the flip-flop?

-SPAK

[FHCx195] National French Fry Day/National Beans ‘n Franks Day

An important holiday for sure.

TODAY IS NATIONAL FRENCH FRY DAY AND NATIONAL BEANS ‘N FRANKS DAY!

Beanie Weenie, whatever. You take a frank of some sort, mix it in with some baked beans. Our guess is that someone needed to make a dinner out of two convenient, long-lasting foods. Chop up some hot dog and throw it in beans. Boom. There’s even fiber in it, so it’s good for you, right?

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SP‘s favorite baked beans.

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Very good hot dogs. Easy to prepare.

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Franks. Beans.

But there’s a more important thing to talk about today: French Fries.

French Fries are the epitome of the beige food. Ultimately tasty, uniquely made in so many different places, undeniably addictive, and most definitely not good for you in large quantities. In no particular order, we want to salute the following places for their excellent French Fries. Please keep doing what you’re doing:

And many, MANY others. Those are just the first that come to mind. Today we celebrated by picking up a snack at Five Guys. We’ve found among our friends that Five Guys’ fries are polarizing. Some friends say that the reason they give you so many in the bag is because they have to get rid of them, since they’re so bad. Those are people you shouldn’t spend too much time around. Five Guys’ fries are crunchy on the outside and soft on the inside, fresh and hot, and best covered in cajun spices.

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Thanks for the fries!

Tomorrow is National Grand Marnier Day and National Mac and Cheese Day.

-SPAK