Homemade In-n-Out Animal Fries

We haven’t been to Southern California in a little over 3 months now. That means that the In-n-Out withdrawal, the so-called “out-n-out,” has finally set in. Luckily for us, with AK‘s creativity and SP‘s methodicalness, we have a temporary solution until our next visit West. Or South. Wherever there’s burgers.

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We’ve tried a few different ways of making what we miss most: animal style fries. People like the burgers and all, but for us, it’s all about that extremely saucy, super oniony fry mixture that gets our motors running. There are some serious bummer recipes out there that basically say that Thousand Island dressing is the same thing. They’re wrong. Here’s the closest we’ve come:

THE RECIPE FOR THE SOUSE:

  • 1 cup Hellmann’s Light Mayo
  • 1/2 cup (or a little extra) Ketchup
  • 3 Tbsp sweet pickle relish
  • 1/2 tsp salt
  • 1/2 tsp pepper
  • 1 tsp sugar
  • 1 tsp cider vinegar

Basically you mix all of it and set it in the fridge for a couple hours for maximum impact. But making it looks a little funny.

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Heinz for the appropriate taste.

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Maaaayo. Maaaaaaaaaaaayo. Daylight come and me wanna make fries.

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SOMEONE BLED ALL OVER OUR MAYO!

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We relish making this sauce.

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You can also add a bit of garlic powder if you want.

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If you went to Kindergarten, you may remember that you get different colors when you mix stuff together.

Ok, so the sauce is made. The next important part is the umyum. This part is even more tricky than mixing the sauce because it requires patience, varying temperatures, and a keen eye. We’ll leave the eyeball part to AK.

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White onion outperforms yellow onion in this mixture.

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Dice. (Yes there’s yellow onion back there that we were going to use for our Sloppy Joes.)

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A tbsp and a half of vegetable oil, and throw in the onions.

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Leave it on super low heat, covered, for 30 minutes. For serious. Just leave it alone. SP STOP OPENING IT TO CHECK ON THEM!

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After that 30 minutes, bring the heat up and stir for about 6-8 minutes. Then throw in 1/4-1/2 cup of water, leaving it on hot, and let the water cook out. This will help loosen any stubborn bits of umyum and help the flavor get a bit smoky.

Ok. Now it’s time to build our animal fries. We may be a bit sacrilegious because we aren’t using cheese, but then again, we can’t source In-n-Out fries either. So this can only be a temporary fix.

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We used some Ore Ida “zesties.” They’re great seasoned fries to make in the oven and really good quality fries no matter the style you get. 

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Get some of the umyums on there.

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DOUSE IN SOUSE!!

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Served tonight alongside some homemade Untidy Josephs.

Please feel free to try the recipe and give us your feedback!

Man it feels good to type up some stuff again. Catch you on the flip-flop?

-SPAK

[FHCx78] National Sloppy Joes Day/National Lacy Oatmeal Cookie Day

Sloppy Joe, sloppy sloppy Joe.

TODAY IS NATIONAL SLOPPY JOES DAY AND NATIONAL LACY OATMEAL COOKIE DAY!

Oh the sloppy Joe. Such an amazing food. For when you have ground beef but you’re just to lazy to shape it into something and you don’t have a box of some sort of Helper to make any major changes. Our recipe comes from this magical condiment called Ketchipotle, that we modify by adding a bit of Famous Dave’s sauce.

2016-03-18 17.35.082016-03-18 17.28.052016-03-18 17.41.242016-03-18 17.43.29Using a 93% lean beef, we manage to keep this thing super healthy and filling. The ketchipotle makes it spicy and juicy. It has attained a status of regular-rotation dinner for us, so we were happy to celebrate!

Our other venture today was making Lacy Oatmeal Cookies. We weren’t sure from the outset what made an oatmeal cookie particularly “lacy.” We researched and found that while a regular oatmeal cookie may be doughy and soft, a lacy oatmeal cookie is prepared with a very wet batter and ends up making very thin wafer cookies.

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1 cup quick cook oats, 1/4 cup white flour, 1.5 tsp baking powder, 0.5 tsp salt

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3/4 cup sugar, 1/3 cup butter, beaten until fluffy. Add 1 egg and 1 tsp of vanilla.

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Mix the flour stuff with the wet stuff.

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Scoop out by the teaspoonful onto a sprayed cookie sheet. Make sure they’re far enough apart!

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They expand and become very thin.

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Mmmm

They are SUPER good. Normally SPAK likes softer, chewier cookies. Gooey chocolate chip kinds of things. But these, which are meant to be crispy, work perfectly. We got them while they were fresh, too, which made them leaps and bounds better. Plus, with a major reduction in sugar and butter from the recipe we found online, and using a teaspoon measure to make 36 cookies, each one was a nice low calorie especially for how big they were.

But part of saving on the calories means not eating all of them. We gave a whole bunch to our neighbor (SP‘s coworker) and his daughter. She did an impression for us in order to earn the cookies. It was adorable.

Tomorrow is our first four-holiday day. Tomorrow we celebrate: Maple Syrup Day, Poultry Day, Chocolate Caramel Day, and Corn Dog Day (the first Saturday of the NCAA tournament). Yikes.

SPAK